The free birds are giving up their singing,
The first thing they do each morning is login.
Ostriches have learned to wear bras
And bolster their self-esteem with mindfulness.
Meanwhile rabbits are mesmerised by television
They can't take their eyes off 24-hour news.
Even slugs are slowly moving with the times,
They all speak pure Estuary with glottal stops.
In hives there is a new type of bee, it seems,
Not a worker, a drone or a queen but a flaneur.
The flaneur bee is too heavy to fly and couldn't care