Demos today (Saturday 31 August 2019): Stop the Coup

Here's the main information hub for today's #StopTheCoup protest - https://t.co/AAZUgkhdVX please share...

— Paul Mason (@paulmasonnews) August 31, 2019

Boris Johnson is trying to bypass parliament and pursue his "gun to own head" national suicide policy over Brexit. Don't let the monkey play with that gun.

Short Stories: Accepting submissions, more required

Update 30 August 2019: So far we have selected and confirmed three out of 88. The closing date is 30 September but as we’re “optioning” as we go, it’s advisable not to delay sending your submissions. The contributors already span oceans both geographically and in theme and styles. There is no reading fee. Each writer receives two copies of the book when it’s published.

Links:

• Books in the series
• Details and how to submit

Update October 2019

• Lineup for New Short Stories 11 revealed

Short Story of the Month, September 2019

The Willesden Herald New Short Stories Story of the Month

September 2019: Rip Rap by Dan Powell

"It is still dark when you finally arrive. A few streetlights set about the expanse of the cliff-top car park are dead, their bulbs ghostly and pale as blind eyes. All the parking bays are empty. The dim glow of the dashboard clock displays just after four, but like the speedometer, like the fuel gauge, like everything about the Astra, the hands are old and tired and worn and not to be trusted. It’s a miracle the car got this far."

Dan Powell’s prize-winning short fiction has appeared in the pages of Being Dad, The Lonely Voice, Unthology, The London Magazine and Best British Short Stories. His debut collection, Looking Out of Broken Windows, was shortlisted for the Scott Prize and longlisted for the Frank O'Connor International Short Story Award and the Edge Hill Prize. He is currently working on a second story collection and a debut novel, is a First Story writer-in-residence, and a Doctoral Researcher in Creative Writing at University of Leicester. He procrastinates at danpowellfiction.com and on Twitter as @danpowfiction.

Continuing our retrospective series, “Rip Rap” is included in Willesden Herald: New Short Stories 8, together with stories by  Jo Barker Scott, Joan Brennan, Gina Challen, Nick Holdstock, CG Menon, Angela Sherlock, Megan Taylor, Medina Tenour Whiteman and Lindsay Waller-Wilkinson.

Beautiful shop replaced with monstrous logo & void

How heartbreaking is this? Spiegelhalters in Mile End Rd - the developers preferred to destroy the nineteenth century shopfront for sake of an architectural void. https://t.co/Cq3GIEj3oH pic.twitter.com/FX5i5BOezF

— Spitalfields Life (@thegentleauthor) August 19, 2019

It's easier to tangle than untangle

Seconds and moments don't follow, they permute.
One on the microwave countdown cannot
be understood as two together tangle
with the next and prior but those are only
yours. The dusty vase on that shelf has its own
infinity. The fruit fly on the door, a few more.

--
Stephen Moran

Text of phone call from Boris Johnson to Leo Varadkar

Exclusive

Text from a transcript of the first phone conversation between Boris Johnson and Leo Varadkar, as leaked to the Willesden Herald.

Boris Johnson: I want to assure you that we will never put physical checks or infrastructure at the border in Ireland after Brexit, Leo. If I may use a metaphor here, British businessmen - and women - will never wear clothes after Brexit, they will go naked, happen what may. The Irish can wear clothes, if they wish.

Leo Varadkar: Won't you be a bit exposed? No pun intended.

BJ: No, seriously! Do as you will. Cows, sheep, linen, pantechnicons - let them fly back and forth. Ramble where you will, we will not be concerned. You may put some obstacles on your side, if you insist but as for the UK, come one come all, as they say. And come as you are. We're naked, as it were, so anything goes.

LV: Ah now Boris, are you pulling my leg?

BJ: Not at all. By the way, Northern Ireland is in the UK, isn't it? You are aware. I think I'm right about that one. I found out the other day that the Isle of Man isn't. Who knew?!

LV: Ah Boris, you're winding me up.

BJ: Of course. Of course. But they do have marvellous kippers in the old I.O.M., Leo.

LV: And Norman Wisdom. And Nigel Mansell.

BJ: Norman is sadly no longer with us. But look Leo, I'll come to the point.

LV: Go on.

BJ: Rejoin the UK and you can have the Isle of Man.

LV: Nah, you're alright.

BJ: But if you do go through with this EU way of negotiating you're going to have your kippers cut off from Britain, old man.

LV: We're not doing anything, Boris. It's you who are leaving. You will have your olives cut off.

BJ: Right, right. Sounds dreadful! You're right, I completely forgot it's we who are leaving. I must tie a string around my finger. You're kicking us out on October 31.

LV: Not at all, Boris, you're welcome to stay. I know some of the winos in Brussels - no names no pack drill - might have said "Here's your hat" but don't mind them.

BJ: It wasn't me, it was Mrs May. They haven't said anything to me yet. It's almost as if they can't wait to be shot of us. This is a big mistake they've made, kicking the UK out of the EU.

LV: Well come over to Dublin and drown your sorrows. We'll talk again. Cheers.

BJ: Sláinte.

--
Feargal Mooney

Short Story of the Month, August 2019

The Willesden Herald New Short Stories Story of the Month

August 2019: Dark Song by Roberta Dewa

“I slip into the water. I didn’t plan to swim, but there’s still static fizzing in my veins from last night’s concert and as the river laps me up I’m cooling down, the static disappearing into a string of bubbles streaming out all around me and rising up from the deep channel, like there’s a diver down there somewhere."

Photo: Roberta Dewa
(c) Ursula Kelly Photography

Roberta Dewa has always written fiction, and in her twenties published three historical novels with Robert Hale. While studying for various degrees she published poetry and short fiction, including a first short story collection, Holding Stones (Pewter Rose Press, 2009). In 2013 she published a memoir, The Memory of Bridges, and a contemporary novel followed: The Esplanade (Weathervane Press, 2014). Since retiring from university teaching, she has been writing poetry and short stories again, and in November 2017 won the Willesden Herald prize with her story Dark Song. She is currently coming to the end of the first draft of a new novel.

Continuing our retrospective series, “Dark Song” is included in Willesden Herald: New Short Stories 10 having won first prize in the WH short story competition 2017. Visit Robert Dewa – Author and Lecturer.

Partly to blame for Boris Johnson PM?

Boris Johnson is about to become prime minister of the UK. In the back pages of the Willesden Herald you will find several links to articles by him in his Wodehouse-like humorous style. As a columnist, he was a hoot but as prime minister he is more likely to be a scream. In fact he is now closely associated with screams, because of the sounds that emanated from his flat on the first night of his Tory leadership campaign. There is only one thing he could do now to return to the status of affable comedian: resign!

Here is a Guardian journalist confessing to helping, accidentally, Johnson to arrive at this catastrophe of becoming prime minister: "Boris Johnson, the prime minister? I’m sorry to say that I’m partly to blame" by Matthew d’Ancona

Wellington Estate: Canal Club under threat

AT THE CANAL CLUB- a report on the threat to community spaces at the Wellington Estate in Bethnal Green: https://t.co/kWt3TFylak Photos by @rachelferriman pic.twitter.com/qlQGlniNhe

— Spitalfields Life (@thegentleauthor) July 21, 2019

"Novelist Sarah Winman visited the Canal Club in Bethnal Green recently with Photographer Rachel Ferriman to report on the threat to the community spaces at the Wellington Estate.
...
"The proposal for the Wellington Estate is to demolish the Canal Club and remove the open space and community asset it provides. This is to construct a further twenty-two flats on an already densely populated estate which was built in the thirties as an answer to slum clearance – basically, it is taking space from those who have little to start with.
...
"...the Canal Club land was given by the GLC  to the people of the Wellington Estate in the late seventies and early eighties to offset the overcrowding and the lack of balconies and gardens."

Tower Hamlets Council wants to cram a few more flats into the space occupied at present by a communal garden beside the canal. Follow this link for the full report and photo gallery:
http://spitalfieldslife.com/2019/07/21/at-the-canal-club/.

Did you know? We're on Duotrope.com

For many years, the Willesden Herald has been listed by Duotrope, for which we are very grateful as it has greatly helped in bringing writers from around the world to our submissions page. Why not take a look at their features for writers? You won’t see a more impressive resource for writers seeking opportunities to place their work. And while you’re there, you might like to take a look at their listing for New Short Stories 11. You can see the basic listing, which is excellent, and if you sign up you can get even more info.

"Raft of the Twats" masterpiece by Cold War Steve

Raft of the Twats pic.twitter.com/Opws4hnUPP

— Cold War Steve (@Coldwar_Steve) May 13, 2019

A parody of Théodore Géricault's painting "The Raft of the Medusa" is one of Cold War Steve's masterpieces.

Now reading for New Short Stories 11

We are open till September 30 for submissions to the latest in our series of short story anthologies, featuring the best new writing from around the world.

You can find plentiful examples of what we like in our back issues and also in our Story of the Month features, as well as in the periodicals listed under Links. We’re generally looking for literary fiction not genre stories.

The only payment we can offer at this time is two copies of the book when it is published.  Full details are set out in the submission form area.

“Willesden Herald: New Short Stories 11” will be published simultaneously in the US and UK in early 2020 and will be available from the main online booksellers by print on demand. We can also do print runs on favourable terms when bulk orders are requested.

See our New Short Stories blog and The Willesden Herald for updates and features that may be of interest. (Link: Submit)

New Short Stories 11 on the horizon

London, July 2: In that too rare spirit of international cooperation, the team behind the New Short Stories book series is getting together again to create another issue with the best short stories we can find. There won't be a competition this time, it will be a good old submit/accept/reject process with arbitrary editorial decisions completely unaccountable to the world. Yes, traditional, if you like. Details to follow. (Ed.)

Spiritual Wellbeing

Holloway Road

Short Story of the Month, July 2019

The Willesden Herald New Short Stories Story of the Month

June 2019: "Curtains" by Charles Lambert

"When Helen gets back from the hospital the house is empty. She leaves her weekend bag by the door and wanders from room to room, the kitchen, the hall, the living room, and then upstairs, pausing for breath on the halfway landing, her hands folded over her stomach. She rests her hand on the door to David’s study..."

Charles Lambert was born in the United Kingdom but has lived in Italy for most of his adult life. His most recent novel is Prodigal, recently longlisted for the Polari Prize 2019. His previous novel, The Children's Home, was praised by Kirkus Reviews as ‘a one-of-a-kind literary horror story’, while Two Dark Tales, published in October 2017, was described by Owen King as the work of a ‘terrific devious story teller’. Earlier books include three novels, a collection of prize-winning short stories and a memoir, With a Zero at its Heart, selected by the Guardian as one of its top ten books from 2014.

Continuing our retrospective series, "Curtains" is included in Willesden Herald: New Short Stories 6 together with stories by Eliza Robertson, Virginia Gilbert, Nick Holdstock, Geraldine Mills and others.

Visit Charles Lambert's blog on WordPress.

On reading "The Empty Promise of Boris Johnson"

The Empty Promise of Boris Johnson (Sam Knight, The New Yorker)

This is a very interesting and educational article, containing a potted biography of Boris Johnson, charting and explaining his political aims, which can be summed up nicely in his own words as "I have nothing." In short, he has no fixed beliefs and doesn't believe in the perfectibility of people or systems and treats life, journalism and elections as a rambunctious game of King of the Castle, which he is determined to win.

His main virtue, if you can isolate any, is that he cheers people up. I think that is very fair, the life and soul of the party but in more ways than one, "not the man you want driving you home afterwards," as Amber Rudd famously quipped. It is hard to be cheered up in the face of an oncoming juggernaut or cliff edge and a driver full of Pimms.

Johnson is portrayed as a real-life version of PG Wodehouse's Bertie Wooster. If the final two in the Tory leadership ballot turn out to be Gove v Johnson, it will be like a contest between Jeeves and Wooster, which does indeed happen from time to time in the books. Hunt, Javid or Stewart as the opponent would merely be one of Wodehouse's frequent unsatisfactory stand-in butlers. When it comes to Wooster v Jeeves, it's always Jeeves who wins but he lets Wooster think he's won. Johnson would be a figurehead and Gove the man with the plan:- and that's where the analogy breaks down.

Pressure-washing the pavements

Greenford Road

Harrow Council workers were out last night cleaning the pavements near Sudbury Hill station. This paving is relatively new, having just been redesigned and renewed over the last two years. 

Impressive happy birthday sign

Spotted on the corner of Greenford Road and South Vale, Harrow

Whoever Pat is, here's hoping he had a happy birthday.

Short Story of the Month, June 2019

The Willesden Herald New Short Stories Story of the Month

June 2019: Set Dance by Angela Sherlock

“Suddenly, very precisely placing the oddity of individual lives in the perspective of a bigger, slower rural pattern where everything can be accepted…Angela Sherlock’s Set Dance, a very unusual story, a very interesting story.” (Maggie Gee)

Angela Sherlock has worked in engineering and in education, but now lives in Devon where she writes full time. She has published reviews and articles but now concentrates on fiction. ‘Set Dance’ comes from her collection, To know they dreamed, which explores the Irish diaspora. She is currently working on a collection that takes its themes from elements of the periodic table. Her stories have appeared in literary journals and anthologies, the most recent online in Virtual Zine.

“Set Dance” is also available in Willesden Herald: New Short Stories 5 together with stories by eleven other outstanding writers.

Visit AngelaSherlock.com

Advice for Rylan!

It's feels like a long time since we had a music video.



"Rylan you should try to get some sun" (The National)
Must be a different Rylan.

Short Story of the Month, May 2019

The Willesden Herald New Short Stories Story of the Month

May 2019: Rash by Megan Taylor

“The ancient hinged mirror reflected back three Frans, each one streaked. Beyond her, the walls of her bedroom were a faded peach, her teenage posters removed long ago, but in the lamp’s glow, the walls appeared duskier than usual and Fran also looked muted, almost satiny, despite the rash.”

Megan Taylor is the author of three novels, ‘How We Were Lost’ (Flame Books, 2007), ‘The Dawning’ (Weathervane Press, 2010) and ‘The Lives of Ghosts’ (Weathervane Press, 2012), as well as a collection, ‘The Woman Under the Ground and Other Stories’ (Weathervane Press, 2014), which includes her Willesden Herald’s shortlisted ‘Rash’.

Recent short stories have been placed in several competitions, and appeared in a variety of publications, including Dark Lane’s 6th and 7th anthologies and Neon.  A fourth novel, ‘We Wait’, is due out from Eyrie Press in 2019. (www.megantaylor.info)

"Rash" is also available in Willesden Herald: New Short Stories 8 together with stories by nine other outstanding writers.

Be clear. Vote LibDem to say "Remain!" on May 23rd 2019

Theresa, Boris, Trump, Farage, Corbyn.... they want Brexit.

Liberal Democrats are fighting for Remainers across Britain who want to #StopBrexit.
Vote Liberal Democrat on 23 May > https://t.co/IppSIisDi9 pic.twitter.com/0NizfOYs3m

— Liberal Democrats (@LibDems) May 12, 2019

Register to vote by post by Tuesday 7th, impossible?

The registration service offered by RegisterToVote.eu, as reported earlier this week, which offered to submit details for people who filled in a form online, has been closed down by the Electoral Commission.

The Electoral Commission said: “We urge EU citizens that [sic] want to vote in the European parliamentary elections in the UK to only apply to register to vote through their local council or official websites. We welcome efforts by campaigners to encourage eligible electors to register to vote. However, our advice to anyone not yet registered is to only apply directly at www.gov.uk/registertovote.” (From: https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2019/may/04/site-claiming-to-help-eu-citizens-register-to-vote-is-shut-down)

Postal applications must be received by Tuesday 7th, which is difficult at the time of writing, as it's now Saturday May 4th, and Monday is a bank holiday. It is believed that very few of the over 3 million EU citizens in the UK who need to register to vote in the European Parliament elections have done so.

There is still a possibility that the elections scheduled for May 23rd might be cancelled but that becomes ever more unlikely as days go by.

The thoughts of Red Woodward

1. Never trust anybody honest.

2. This everybody dying malarkey has got beyond a joke.

3. What a person says a lot about says a lot about a person.

4. Minimalism is the biggest load of crap ever.

5. There's no such thing as waiting. You are either doing something useful or you are doing something useless.

6. Meditation? It's a racket.

7. You can put me in a box when I pop my clogs but not before.

8. Evidently I'm past my sell by-date but not my use-by date.

9. In life, you either do something and feel guilty about it, or do nothing and feel guilty about it. There is no in-between.

10. You can't put everything right in the fourth act of a three-act play.

11. The only review worth a damn is written on a cheque.

12. We're not about to go bang.

--

Feargal Mooney

South Vale, Harrow this morning

Chestnut tree in bloom at the corner of South Vale and Wood End Road