now incorporating the Sudbury Hill and Wood End Times

Friday, July 29, 2011

Willesden Herald citizenship test of Britishness

1. Is "indoor cricket" (a) a type of insect, (b) a traditional sport, (c) a euphemism for coitus

2. In Britain homosexuality is (a) illegal, (b) legal, (c) compulsory

3. Traditionally a British virgin carrying a bag of gold may walk unmolested (a) from Land's End to John O'Groats, (b) from the tube station to half way home, (c) into the river Ouse

4. A jam sandwich is (a) a staple comestible, (b) a police car, (c) a golf club

5. The correct response to "good morning" is (a) good evening, (b) no response is required, (c) ya woh

6. Which of the following would you find at a typical British garden party (a) a whole roast goat, (b) Morris dancers, (c) mortgage protection insurance advice


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