Thursday, January 08, 2009

Willesden tech show 2009

Dragons' Den cold sweat inducing gadgets at the biennial Willesden tech show 2009

The disappearing book: After a page has been read it fades to blank from exposure to light. At the end you're left with a handy notebook.

The Kronk, an electronic golf putter: This will be used mainly for training purposes, as it's unlikely to be allowed in competitive tournaments. Tiny cameras in the putter scan the terrain, including slopes, between the putter and the hole when you place the putter on the ground. When the data is processed the putter head displays a red light on the left or right along a scale to indicate when your putter head is angled too far to either side, or a green light in the centre of the scale when it's angled correctly. Next, sensors will analyse your practice swings and activate forward or backward red lights along another scale to indicate when you need to increase or reduce your swing, or a green light in the centre of the scale when it's correct. Anyone who has used a guitar tuner will understand this system of red and green lights along a scale. When you get the two green lights, go for it and hole every time. (This was the W.H. science correspondent's idea.)

Toothpaste dispenser: All the cost of toothpaste is in the packaging. Get a cheap refill and put it in our handy wall-mounted or free-standing dispenser. Simply press the big lever to dispense directly onto your toothbrush. No more arguments about who squeezes the tube in the middle! Plus you save money and help the environment.

Biodegradable poopscoopers: This is basically a special cardboard and lined paper bag with its own built-in handles to operate like a plastic poopscooper but you pop the entire thing into the dog waste bin and it is handier and better for the environment. If you've ever had to fiddle with those dreadful plastic bags that take an age to open and place into those special plastic contraptions, especially if you have two dogs or more to walk, you'll know what a royal pain it can be. Now you can simply take the next self-contained impervious cardboard and paper ready-made scoops, which are shaped and behave just like the plastic ones, and you're not only saving time but switching to biodegradable containers. The paper mechanism for "turning inside out" such that the hands are protected and the container sealed would be refined and worked out so that the thing snaps over and seals itself.

There are millions to be made from any new application for paper, I believe, as there is a limitless supply of cheap material that can be resold expensively if only more applications can be discovered. So kindly send me an ex-gratia payment if you become the next Percy Cats'-Eyes wozname, from any of these. I still haven't had anything after suggesting "Chilli Non Carne" to Linda McCartney Foods, they just used it and never even replied (true).

Simon Moribund